Chipotle Chicken Pasta Minus the Chipotle

So years back, when I was still a freshman and sophomore, jobless, and living off of my parents money, we used to go to Cheesecake Factory.  One of my favorite dishes on their menu was the Chipotle Chicken Pasta--  penne pasta with some amazing kinda creamy spicy sauce, chicken, peppers and onions.  Naturally, you can see why I liked it.  So sometime about two years ago, when I was no longer living off my parents salary, I decided to try to make it at home.  I had no idea what was in it but knew a thing or two about flavors and decided to just wing it.  Needless to say, I put absolutely no chipotle in it.  So I'm sure you must be saying, "well then there's no possible way you've made a replica of chipotle chicken pasta that tastes anything similar to the original!"  False.  I have.  I've made a cheaper, just as yummy version while craftily avoiding the annoyance and cost of chipotle peppers.

This past time, I made a much bigger batch than I have in the past.  I wouldn't ever recommend making as much as I did, so I'm going to provide you with the recipe for a normal person amount.  This is the ultimate spicy comfort food.  Enjoy: chipotle chicken pasta, minus the chipotle, plus the pepperjack cheese!

what you need...

1 lb penne pasta

1/2 red pepper, diced

1/2 yellow pepper, diced

1/2 large yellow onion, diced

15 oz can tomato sauce (I use hunts)

8 oz block pepperjack cheese, grated

4 pieces thing sliced chicken breast (about 1/3 - 1/2 lb chicken)

Crushed red pepper

Salt and Pepper

Olive Oil for cooking

what you need to do...

1  Cook pasta as directed on box.  If you are doing this ahead of time, strain and set aside tossed with a bit of oil to prevent sticking.  Otherwise, this can be done simultaneously with the rest of the preparation.

2  In a medium sauce pan, combine yellow peppers, red peppers, and onion and cook over medium high heat until aromatic and color begins to leave peppers.  Be sure to stir the mixture often to ensure even cooking.

3  Once the peppers are done cooking, add the tomato sauce, 1 tbs crushed red pepper, and a dash of salt and pepper to the vegetable mixture and stir.  Cover to avoid splattering and allow the mixture to continue to cook over medium heat.  (note: if you do not like thing particularly spicy, adjust the crushed red pepper amounts).  When chicken is cooking during step 4, stir in 8 oz grated pepperjack cheese and reduce heat to low.  Stir constantly.  Sauce should begin to thicken as cheese melts in and will look like a creamy red sauce.

4  In a medium-large pan, heat a tbs olive oil.  Season chicken with salt and pepper and cook in oil over medium heat until cooked through.  Strain chicken on paper towel and cut into cubes on cutting board.

5  Combine all ingredients in a large pot with the pasta and stir well to evenly distribute the sauce.  Serve as is or topped with crushed red pepper, or a sprinkle of pepperjack cheese!

Deck the Halls with Bottles of Rum

It's that time of year again... That time where we all tear through our presents and then sit depressed at the fact that we have, not only 364 more days until Christmas, but also 3 more months of unbearable cold.  Somewhere around January 15th I give up and search for cheap tickets to Puerto Rico.  I do this daily for about five weeks, while intermittently scrolling through my pictures of the gorgeous beaches and crying.  Some might say this is self destructive.  No, in fact.  I see the glass as half full and instead consider this reaching towards my goal of a better future.  A future where it's 80 degrees on Christmas.  A future where I bathe in the ocean with a Medallia in hand on New Years.  A scarfless, jacketless future where adults laugh and children play carelessly.

But because this dream is highly unattainable on my current fiances and with my current educational standing.  So instead, I've decided to bring a little bit of Puerto Rico to Boston.  No, unfortunately not the warm, beautiful, sunny, beachy part, although it has been quite refreshingly not freezing thus far this year.  Instead, I decided to make the drink first introduced to me in Puerto Rico that continues to impress me with each sip.  It is by far one of the most refreshing, light drinks one could wish for.  The Mojito--it is simply seltzer, lime, sugar, mint and, of course, rum because absolutely everything in Puerto Rico (including cereal), has rum in it.

Because these were for a holiday party, I wanted to try to make them festive.  A coworker suggested adding cranberries as a garnish.  I emphasize garnish here because, despite my efforts to make this point clear to my friends, the cranberries and mint in this drink were not take as a representation of holly but instead, a salad.  So like I said, garnish.


Also, I don't really measure when I make these.  I'm going to try to provide you with measurements here but chances are yours might be a little different.  There's nothing I can do about this.  I just don't measure.

what you need...
8-10 oz Seltzer (plain, unflavored)
1/3 a lime (or less if you prefer it less limey)
~12 fresh mint leaves
1.5 oz simple syrup (I home make this but you can find this is a liquor store, also add more for sweeter)
3 oz silver rum (important that the rum is not spiced)
Whole cranberries (to garnish)
Ice

what you need to do...
1  In a tall glass, combine simple syrup, juice from lime, and mint leaves and muddle.  This is a term, for those of you who are unfamiliar, that means to use a blunt tool to firmly mash the ingredients together.  There are muddlers for this, however the back of a wooden spoon will work just fine.  Do this for about 2 minutes, or until all of the mint appears fairly bruised.  This is an important step, without it, you won't get the flavor of the mint at all.  The mint will stay in the drink as continued flavor so a straw will be helpful.
2  Add seltzer and rum and mix well.  Garnish with lime wedges and cranberries and add ice.  Play around with this a little bit.  The first time it may be a bit funky, but the more you make it the better it will taste.  You just have to figure out the perfect mixing for you!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

The Perfect Breakfast. You're Welcome.

It has become more than apparent that there will never be a shortage of things I am able to create with kielbasa.  Quite by accident, we found ourselves with more Kielbasa than we imagined being able to conquer. Needless to say, we've nearly conquered it.  Being on our slow food kick, it seemed more than obvious that we needed to find a way to move through all that kielbasa that we already had.  But eating four links of kielbasa is indeed quite difficult if you stick to the basics.  So we thought a bit outside the box and may have stumbled upon the best, cheap breakfast humanly possible: Sunnyside Hash.  Potato, kielbasa and onion hash served under a sunny side egg with a garnish of Siracha sauce.  Potatoes are cheap.  Onions are cheap.  Eggs are manageably cheap.  And we already had kielbasa and Siracha Sauce.  So essentially this meal took a grand total of three dollars to create.

This meal will get you ready to kick any day's ass.  Hangover beware-- one plate of this and you're about to feel better than ever.  Hungry yet?  I would hope so.

what you need...
(serves two)
1 potato
1/2 link of kielbasa
1 medium onion
2 egg
Siracha sauce (optional)
Salt and pepper to taste
Oil for sauteing

what you need to do...
1  Chop the onion, potato and kielbasa.  The potato and kielbasa should be cut into similar sized cubes. 
2  Combine onion, potato, kielbasa, olive oil, salt and pepper in medium skillet and cook over medium high heat, covered.  You will need to stir constantly to avoid burning and you're going to need some help from my long lost friend patience.  Turning up the heat will not cook the potatoes through faster.  No, sadly I've learned that instead, this method will burn everything.  Then you will have burnt, hard potatoes and you're morning will be off to a rough start.  Keep the skillet covered while cooking, stir often to avoid uneven cooking, and if you notice it starting to char, do the obvious right thing and turn down the heat.  The hash will be done when the potatoes are soft enough that the spoon is able to easily cut through them.
3  When hash is about finished, prepare the eggs sunny side up.  I'm not gunna explain this.  If you don't know how to do it, you'll need to cover them and never turn them.  That's all.  If you'd prefer, once over easy will suffice.  Basically, when the yolk oozes into the hash, it's gunna be orgasmic so try to make that happen.  If you don't like you're eggs with a runny yolk, make them absolutely any way you would like.  Literally, anything will work.  We just like runny yolks here.
4  Serve egg over the hash, topped with pepper, and garnished with Siracha sauce.  Breakfast perfection.  You're welcome.

The Slowest Food You've Seen Thus Far

So it turns out that cooking fancy things costs money.  And although I pretend, it turns out that I am not actually wealthy enough to fund this exquisite blog on a daily basis.  So this week, we decided to get down to business and take the slow food challenge.

The slow food challenge is a movement we learned about at the Boston Local Food festival.  Essentially, the main idea involves trying to create nightly meals using ingredients you have on hand and fresh local ingredients for 5 dollars or less.  The idea is that you can create nutritious, fresh meals for the same price as a fast food value meal.  We said, screw fresh local ingredients (mainly because Shaw's is closer), and got to work figuring out how to feed ourselves for 5 dollars each night.

Night number one: grab a jar of Culinary Circle Sundried Tomato Alfredo Sauce, some real cheap veggies, and  throw together an impromptu pasta dish.  This turned out absolutely fantastic, despite how disorganized this adventure began.

what you need...
1 jar of Culinary Circle Sun-dried Tomato Alfredo Sauce
1/2 box of Fettuccine (cooked as directed on the box)
A big 'ole bundle of broccoli
1/2 cup cherry tomatoes, chopped
1 medium onion, chopped
Salt and Pepper
Oregano
Olive Oil

what you're gunna need to do...
1  In a medium skillet, combine broccoli, tomato and onion with olive oil.  Saute over medium high heat, stirring occasionally, for about 5 minutes.  Add the jar of tomato sauce, reduce heat to low, and allow to simmer.  Stir often to avoid burning.
2  Add the cooked pasta to the skillet and mix until the pasta is coated evenly.  Season with pepper and oregano and take it to your face.

An R-Rated Coffee Milkshake

The Espresso Martini also known as, perfection.  Imagine, if you will, a drink created only from alcohol (no mixer needed) that tastes like the best cup of iced coffee you've ever had.  Is it possible, you ask?  Oh it's possible.

I got this idea from my coworker two years ago.  My last day of work was New Years Eve day and as a going away gift, she gave me the ingredients for perfection: Bailey's, Kahlua, and Vanilla Vodka.  Two years later the love affair has still not faded.  If you like coffee, coffee ice cream and coffee milkshakes, this drink is going to make your belly very happy.  However, I must warn you-- this drink is very creamy so two more than two of these bad boys might be quite a struggle and things might real weird real fast.


what you need...
1 part Kahlua (or other coffee liquor)
1 part Bailey's (or other Irish Cream)
1 part Absolute Vanilla (or other Vanilla Vodka)
Ice

what you need to do...

My dog wanted at this real bad

1  Combine all ingredients and shake (with crushed ice might be good).  Serve very cold in a martini glass, over crushed or cubed ice.  For a more desserty option, if you will, blend with ice to make a shake.  That was easy.

One Ridiculously Absurd Post-Thanksgiving Feast

Oh did I say I was fasting?  Well, starting Monday, give me a break.  First, I needed to get my chance to create an excessive and delicious "Thanksgiving" meal.  We spent Thanksgiving at my uncle's and so, I wasn't able to celebrate with one of the people whom I am most thankful for in my life... that handsome looking Dan fellow I'm dating.

On black friday (and for some... are we going with grey thursday?) millions of dedicated [psychotic] shoppers waited in the cold for hours, trampled over other dedicated [psychotic] shoppers, and bought hundreds of gifts.  On black friday, the owners of the NBA bought back their players.  And what did I buy?  Steak.  Delicious, juicy, meaty steak.  And beer.  Delicious, juicy, wheaty beer.  Oh and vegetables.  I dreamed up a fantastic meal and invited Dan over for a post-Thanksgiving, re-comma inducing feast.

There were garlic coconut milk mashed sweet potatoes (compliments of Marci), steak tips, brussel sprouts and of course, Pillsbury crescent rolls.  And in keeping with the excessive style of Thanksgiving, there of course were crackers, cheese, dip and stuffed mushrooms to fill you up before you even made it to the dinner table.  As well as coffee and tiramisu for when you no longer wanted to consider, look at, or think about food.  Perfect.  That's one way to stay healthy...

The steak tips were from Mr. Steer meats (a specialty meat shop) and were cooked on the grill by my dad.  I prepared the mashed sweet potatoes and brussel sprouts.  And the Pillsbury dough boy made the crescent rolls-- thanks for your help you chubby little bundle of joy.  The recipe for the sweet potatoes was passed along by my nutritionist and as for the brussel sprouts, well I've never made those but decided to wing it since it can't really be that hard.

Before we start preparing these delicious things, I of course need to get in a short rant.  What grocery store on earth doesn't carry brussel sprouts?  Apparently market basket.  Fail.  So I will put my shame aside and announce to you:  I used frozen brussel sprouts.  But don't fear, I didn't throw these in some water and blandly boil them down.  No, I marinated them and roasted them.  I guess that cancels out somewhere around half of the shame using frozen brussel sprouts has brought me.  That and the fact that they came out delicious.  I rest only half ashamed, and mostcertainly ready to use frozen ones again [gasp].

what we need...
for the garlic and coconut milk mashed potatoes
3 medium to medium large sweet potatoes, skinned, quartered, and chopped into three 1/2 inch slices per each quarter 
3/4 cup of coconut milk plus 1/2 cup more
2 cloves garlic, chopped
1 tsp salt
1 tbs sugar
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp - 1 tbs crushed red pepper (to taste)

what we need to do...
1  In a medium sauce pan, combine all ingredients except the additional 1/2 cup of milk.  The 3/4 cup of coconut milk will not cover all of the slices of sweet potato, don't panic.  Cook over medium high heat covered, for about thirty minutes, or until the potatoes have become very tender.  
2  Once the potatoes are tender, remove from heat and mash using a masher.  Add additional coconut milk as desired.  I added the entire additional 1/2 cup for creamier sweet potatoes.


what we need...
for [previously frozen, currently delicious] brussel sprouts
1 package of [frozen] brussel sprouts
3 tbs olive oil
2 cloves garlic, chopped
1/2 tsp crushed red pepper (optional)
1/4 cup onion, chopped
Salt and Pepper

what we need to do...
1  Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.  In a large gallon ziplock bag, combine the brussel sprouts, oil, salt, pepper, garlic and crushed red pepper.  Close and shake to disperse among all of the brussel sprouts.  Allow to marinate for at least 30 minutes.  
2  Displace the brussel sprouts into an 8 x 8 glass baking pan, and combine with chopped onion in pan.  Cook in the oven for 35 - 45 minutes, stirring two or three times during the cooking process to brown evenly.  Yup, that's all!

Yay for more delicious, gluttonous meals.  Because that's what Thanksgiving is truly all about...

One Ridiculously Absurd Thanksgiving Feast

This thanksgiving, we switched things up a bit and went to my uncle's house, thus totally erratically my opportunity to do any sort of cooking.  But it just so turns out that my lust for cooking might actually come from my uncle, who completely out did himself.  He prepared an absolutely delicious, and not to mention excessively large, Thanksgiving feast that for the first time in my life actually put me into a food comma. For appetizers alone we ate an entire meal.  Raw salmon with an amazing dill sauce, blue cheese tart, spinach and cream cheese rolls, and crackers and cheese.

Before we hear about and look at delicious pictures of all amazing sounding things, let's have a quick discussion about my dad and the turkey.  My dad's a fairly seasoned turkey carver, and was called in as back up when the rest of us didn't want to bother.  His technique is fantastic and he always displays the turkey in a picture perfect presentation.  This time however, he decided that throwing some of the turkey on the floor enhanced our thanksgiving, and thank goodness that he did as we had an outrageous amount of food.  But just to hassle him a bit.. let's check out my dad's floor turkey...

Oh and I guess we can look at his non-floor turkey  

Now back to the rest of the food-- if we weren't bursting at the seems after all those appetizers, we had to suck it up and move on to a deliciously seasoned turkey, a pork roast, mashed potatoes, homemade cranberry sauce, homemade stuffing, green bean casserole, roasted carrots, roasted acorn squash, roasted cauliflower, and roasted brussel sprouts.

Oh and that's not where it ends... no there was dessert.  You see, this Thanksgiving meal was indeed not for the faint of heart.  No, this was for the glutton.  So of course there was coffee and dessert.  Homemade pear and cranberry torte, apple crisp with ice cream, and pumpkin pie.

And now I'm fasting... for the next week.

Happy Thanksgiving From One Fruity Turkey!

Yikes!  So I totally meant to post this yesterday/ last night so it would be up here in time for Thanksgiving.  Technically speaking, you hopefully don't have your family over yet or aren't yet at the in-laws-- if so, I'm so sorry, it's going to be a looooong day.   And thus, if you're truly interested this awesome idea (of course you are why wouldn't you be), then you could take that Thanksgiving Morning walk-of-shame to your local grocery store and pick up some produce.   If not, there's always next year if you have the best memory in the entire world.

I turned this into an activity to do with my kids at work.  We practiced our fine motor skills while handling sharp dangerous objects and contaminating fruit for our parents... what could be a better activity?  Mind you, only one child, one honeydew melon, and absolutely no turkeys were hurt in making of this delightful bringer of thanksgiving cheer  (is that a thing).  And no, I'm not joking, one child was hurt.  Apparently she thought her eyeball was a superb addition to her grape skewer.  She survived and has both eyes-- no worries.  We made this for our Thanksgiving parent breakfast and it was a hit.  This is an awesome idea for breakfast, dessert, or if you're just trying to overly impress someone(s) with your creativity.

what do we need...

1 honey dew melon

1 cantaloupe (cubed)

1 bag of red grapes

2 containers of strawberries (with tops chopped off)

1 container of blueberries

1 pear

Toothpicks

Bamboo skewers

what you need to do...

1  Chop and wash all of the fruit.  In decorative patters or completely randomly, skewer (or have your kids help after clearly disclosing the dangers of bamboo skewers) the grapes, cantaloupe, strawberries and blueberries.  These fruits are the easiest but you can sub in other fruits of choice.  These can be made ahead of time and assembled later as long as they are wrapped and kept in the refrigerator.  You can make as many or as few as desired.  Filling the entire melon will require more fruit than suggested above.  Be sure to leave about an inch and a half of room from the sharp end of the skewer so that they can be secured into the melon.

2  Carefully slice the rounded bottom off the honeydew, making a flat edge so that the melon can rest without rolling.  Secure the pear on the front of the honeydew using two toothpicks and the eyes onto the pear using two blueberries and two additional toothpicks.   Stick to skewers at random into the back of the melon using the sharp end of the skewer.  After the skewers are gone, you can chop up the melon if you're in the mood for even more fruit!

Okay let's have one last look because it's adorable!  Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!! Can't wait to share the delicious things my uncle thinks up after the feast is over!

Some Pretty Bad Ass Blueberry Lemon Pancakes

So I didn't know what to have for dinner tonight, and decided I absolutely did not want to spend any money.  That can be tricky when you don't have food on hand, begging to be prepare.  So we'll settle for pancakes, because they're delicious and cheap.  And besides, what goes better with watching The Godfather than pancakes.  Things lemon-blueberry pancakes and The Godfather have in common: they're both bad ass, and they are both... comforting?

Sorry, by the way, if you're a proponent for not messing around with pancakes.  But we have miles to go before I stop messing around with plain pancakes.

what do we need...
2 cups pancake mix, prepared as directed on the box
Zest from one lemon
Juice from 1/2 the lemon
1 cup blueberries (more or less as desired)
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp vanilla extract 
1 tbs white sugar 
Butter for cooking


what should we do with these cheap things...
1  Prepare the pancake mix as directed on the box.  Zest the lemon into the mix and stir vigorously.  Add baking powder, vanilla, lemon juice, and sugar and mix.  Add blueberries last. 
2  Heat enough butter to coat the pan over medium high heat.  Ladle batter in small scoopfuls on to pan and cook, flipping once.  I assume you know how to prepare pancakes but you never know...

There Has Been A Murder... But It's Okay Because There Was Also Bacon

So apparently we're 42 years old.

My friends and I love the Office.  A few weeks ago we watched an episode from the sixth season called "Murder", in which Michael attempts to distract everyone in the Office from the horrible reality of Bankruptcy with a Murder Mystery game.  So the only natural course of action, of course, was that we host our very own murder mystery dinner and wine party.  Pasta, Passion & Pistols--the Italian themed murder mystery set in New York, where Pepi Roni [astoundingly clever] was found murdered in the basement of his restaurant.

The directions were simple: everyone brings one 10 - 15 dollar bottle of wine and one appetizer.  For those in attendance who were participating in the murder mystery game, costume and crazy accent required.  I expected this to be a good time but it turns out, that was quite the underestimation.  We had an absolutely great time and everyone really brought their A game as far as the cooking and wine goes.  The food was so amazing:

Chicken Parmesan Balls
Homemade Crab Rangoon
Stuffed Mushrooms
Quesadillas
Chipotle Mac and Cheese
Bruschetta
Crackers and Cheese
Melon and Prosciutto



So naturally I took this opportunity to make goat cheese stuffed bacon wrapped prunes... who wouldn't?  They were absolutely delightful and quite ridiculous to assemble.  They went well with the wine and the other foods that everyone brought!

what do we need...
1 container of pitted prunes
1 large log of goat cheese (I think it might be 10 - 12 ounces
1 package of bacon
Toothpicks


what we need to do...
1  If you are going to immediately cook these, preheat the oven to 400 degrees.  Now this part is very technical so pay attention carefully.  You need to literally pump and finger the prunes until you open them and hallow out a large hole in the center.  This is absolutely not a joke and not an exaggeration.  You might want to do this in private, things could, will, and did get real weird when I did this with my friends in the room.
2  After you've opened all of the prunes, add a small amount of goat cheese to the center.  You can do this with a spoon and your fingers, making sure to push the cheese down inside and wash your hands in between every few prunes. 
3  Chop each slice of bacon into thirds and wrap one piece of bacon around each prune.  Secure with a toothpick and set aside on a deep sided baking sheet until ready to cook.  If you have decided you are going to cook these immediately and have preheated your oven, cook these at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes (or until the bacon appears to be crisp and cooked).

I assume you are able to figure this out for yourself but in case not... these are best when they are fresh but will be very hot inside for about 10 minutes so proceed with caution.  Delightful!

Mexican Paninis

Quesadillas are obviously the Mexican grilled cheese.  So then, if we slap some cheese and deli meat on a flour tortilla and melt it down, logically, we have a Mexican panini.  I don't have too much to say about this meal except that it's quick, delicious and cheap.  Also, I'm way too distracted with the wine and cheese party set up that is currently going on around me, as well as the intense hor dourves preparation that is simultaneously and loudly going on.

what do we need...
recipe prepared enough for two people
2 flour tortillas 
1 1/2 cups shredded mozzarella
2 rings pineapple, chopped thinly
1/4 lb deli ham (brown sugar maple is clearly superior)


what we need to do...
1  Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.
2  Lightly butter one side of the tortilla and place, butter side down, on a cookie sheet.  On half of the other side, add ham, pineapple and cheese.  Fold in half, press down firmly, and cook in oven.  
3  Cook for about 3 to 5 minutes, remove from oven and flip.  Return to oven and cook for another 5 minutes or until each side is slightly crispy and golden brown.  Slice with a pizza cutter and enjoy!

Someone Grab The Wok and Let's Get Asian

So it's time to play some catch up here.  I find it more than mildly impressive that we haven't consulted the soy sauce, grabbed the wok and got a little Asian yet.  Chinese food (the fake kind you order post 2 am on Saturdays) is quite possibly one of the most puzzling things on earth.  Let's reflect on their business plan:

Let's open a restaurant.  We'll make food to represent an entire culture but, let's cook absolutely nothing that anyone in that entire culture actually eats.  Then, let's cook it in kegs of fatty oil, make it available until 3 in the morning, and make it insanely addictive.  We need to make sure that indulging in this more than delicious and addictive category of food totally rapes your insides, leaving you filled with regret and feeling like shit directly following consumption.  And to top all that off, let's insert language barrier... [here].

Fantastic.
Well here's my business plan: let's make it at home, cook it in lean oil, prepare it fresh and avoid the stressful and awkward phone call during which you try to express which terribly fatty food you'd like to be brought to you in twenty minutes.  I think I'm on to something here...

So let's squint a little bit [because it's bright in here, don't be ridiculous] and get down to business.


Scallion Pancakes
what we need...
2 cups flour (plus more for dusting)
1 bundle scallions/ green onions
1 cup boiling water
Vegetable oil for  frying [plus more for spreading]
Salt


what we need to do...
[omg it's so complicated and I'm not looking forward to this]
1  In a large mixing bowl, slowly combine the flour with the boiling water until a sticky dough forms.  When  it's cool enough, combine with your hands, and kneed dough on a clean surface.  Return to mixing bowl, cover with a wet paper towel and refrigerate for 30 minutes.  
2  After thirty minutes have past, dice scallions.  Remove dough from the refrigerator and chop into four pieces.  Roll out each individual piece one at a time on a lightly floured surface.  Spread a small amount of vegetable oil over the dough, sprinkle with salt and add some of the scallions. 
3  Roll the dough into a cigar, curl around, and then re-roll out until flat again.  Okay I suck at explaining this so look at the pictures instead.

4  Repeat until all portions are ready for frying.  Heat about 2 cups of vegetable oil in a deep pan over medium high heat.  Once oil is hot, carefully place a pancake in and fry, turning at least once, until the pancake is dark golden brown.  Strain on paper towel, cut into fourths, and eat!!!

and for the fried rice:
what we need...
1 cup dry white rice
2 cloves garlic, dices
A handful of scallions
2 eggs
Dash of milk (for scrambling the eggs)
1 red pepper, chopped finely
1 yellow pepper, chopped finely
Broccoli 
1 cup [more or less to desired amount] teriyaki sauce (I used Yaki-Teriyaki Island Teriyaki Sauce)
Dash of soy sauce
Olive oil
Salt and Pepper to taste


what we need to do...
1  Prepare rice following directions on the back of the box.  Set aside.  Additionally, prepare the eggs as you would scrambled eggs and set aside.
2  In a wok, yup I said wok, or a big pan if you're lame, heat the oil, garlic and scallions over medium high heat.  Once garlic is sizzling, add the other vegetables and teriyaki sauce and cook, covered for about three minutes.  Add rice and eggs, a dash of soy sauce, salt and pepper and toss continuously until cooked to desired level of "fried-ness".

Yeah Chinese food!  
By the way, that dipping sauce is soy sauce, scallions, pepper, sugar, and ground ginger.  Play around and see if you can get a combination you like!